“This is historic! A new discipline at a German university – something like that happens every 20 years.” Henry Falk is in a good mood. He prevailed. Years of field research, countless qualitative studies conducted, committees and professional societies convinced. Now the stocky man in his mid-forties with blonde hair is standing at the desk in the seminar room, which is located in the back corridor of a gray building next to the University of Cologne. In cargo pants and a hoodie, the newly qualified lecturer appears unpretentious. The rows of chairs are still empty on this first day of seminars in the new scientific discipline of windology. A hybrid science, according to Falk, thematically located between applied social science and abstract philosophy.
While he waits for the students, Falk explains the basics of the discipline. “Window cleaning. Everyone does it. But no one realizes what’s behind it.” The dirty window theory he put forward is central. “Window cleaning shows the bipolarity of our mental states. If the windows are clean: maximum opening. Hello world, here I am! If they are dirty: maximum withdrawal. Go away, just leave me alone!” Falk pauses. “The window cleaner…” he continues, “… is a mind changer! Brilliant, I’ll make a note of that! That’s science up close, do you have goosebumps too?”
Henry Falk rummages through a box and hands the reporter a microfiber cloth and window cleaner. “They have to feel it, otherwise they won’t understand.” While the reporter begins with the first window, Falk continues to lecture. “The journey of emotions that we experience when cleaning windows can be metaphysically transferred to our life journey. The beginning is easy, the coarse dirt just comes off. But it becomes more and more difficult to get everything clean. At some point the mid-clean crisis comes: Suddenly doubts prevail! Can I ever do it? And then, at the end: triumph or resignation. Depending on your character. Depending on your skills. That’s life. That’s window cleaning. That’s windology!”
“Is this room 307?” An older lady stands in the door. Short and narrow, her gray hair styled in a bob. Falk invites his first seminar participant in, beaming with joy. Gabriele, 77 years old, senior student, this is how she introduces herself. “Finally a change from the usual program,” she explains her motivation. Falk looks at his watch. The cum tempore has been slightly exceeded at 43 minutes, high time for the seminar to begin.
Top view, pause, reaction, perspective
Gabriele also receives a cleaning cloth and cleaner because physical activity makes it easier to understand the theory, according to the lecturer. While Gabriele and the reporter clean the large windows, Falk explains the four stages of windology knowledge: looking up, pausing, reacting, looking through. This is followed by a long theoretical part, a “wild, discursive ride,” as Falk calls it, which repeatedly touches on other disciplines such as psychology. “The window without streaks…” Falk states emphatically and pauses for art, “… is hubris!” Only to explain a little later that only narcissists strive for sparkling clean windows. The clean pane is a reflection of the source in which Narcissus fell in love with his own image. By the way, Ovid detested cleaning windows, adds Falk.
Four and a half hours later, the first windology seminar is over. Falk still looks dewy. Gabriele and the reporter are exhausted. All windows are cleaned. The lecturer does not seem satisfied with the result. “You are not narcissists, that much is clear,” he says.
Two months and intensive background research later, a call to Henry Falk: There were still a few unanswered questions. Street noises in the background, Falk shouts into the phone that you’re welcome to stop by, he’s conducting field studies.
The address provided is in an industrial area. Henry Falk stands in front of the large window front of an office building and waves in a good mood. Beside him on a ladder, 77-year-old Gabriele is handling a long telescopic pole with one hand. She stretches to wipe the upstairs windows. “I have to finish it today,” Falk grins and puts his hands in his cargo pants pockets. The reporter confronts the lecturer with a business register entry. Did Falk just orchestrate all of this to attract cheap labor for his cleaning company?
Falk seems surprised for a moment, but quickly composes himself. The lecturer smiles as he explains that this is a company founded based on the latest research results in windology. A real start-up from science and even funded by the federal government. He pushes a chamois leather into the reporter’s hand. He doesn’t hold grudges and Gabriele urgently needs a helping hand.